This morning I lost it. Really lost it. I actually threw my brush while letting out an "ARRRRRRRRRG" that I'm sure Princess Kate heard across the pond. Stomping and muttering under my breath while throwing anything in my path out of my way--I caught my reflection in the mirror and realized I was doing a fairly good impression of a 2-year-old's temper tantrum.
The cause? I couldn't find a black sock.
Seriously.
I had fielded questions regarding my husband's disability, covered the atrocities of slavery with our history lesson, returned several phone calls regarding speaking deadlines, and put dinner in the crockpot. The paperwork needed refiling due to a clerical error at the insurance office, the children asked agonizing question of how our country allowed slavery, the speaking took renegotiating, and the chicken going into the crockpot landed first on the floor. All this I took in stride. The black sock put me under.
It's the little things.
Sure, it's the little things that put me under. But God says I have to be faithful in the little things to be trusted with more. Matthew 25:21. He knows the little things offer a mirror of where my heart really resides. I can buck up to handle a big crisis, but when little things come along, I let down my guard.
It's then that I, and everyone else, can see what's really in my heart. A nagging selfishness that want's its way in all things. In the little things I show my desperate need for Jesus to save me from this selfishness that is always ready to rear it's ugly head. How I handle the little things offers ongoing teaching and example for my children--either for the good or the bad. The little things show who I really am.
On seeing my reflection, I took myself in hand and asked Jesus yet again to take away the selfishness in me that expects the universe to orient itself in such a way that I can always find what I want when I want it. I asked Him to fill the part of my heart that can't deal with lost socks. I asked Him to be my Savior yet again.
It's the little things that keep bringing me to the foot of the cross and recognizing my need for Him in every part of my life. Thank God for the little things.
The cause? I couldn't find a black sock.
Seriously.
I had fielded questions regarding my husband's disability, covered the atrocities of slavery with our history lesson, returned several phone calls regarding speaking deadlines, and put dinner in the crockpot. The paperwork needed refiling due to a clerical error at the insurance office, the children asked agonizing question of how our country allowed slavery, the speaking took renegotiating, and the chicken going into the crockpot landed first on the floor. All this I took in stride. The black sock put me under.
It's the little things.
Sure, it's the little things that put me under. But God says I have to be faithful in the little things to be trusted with more. Matthew 25:21. He knows the little things offer a mirror of where my heart really resides. I can buck up to handle a big crisis, but when little things come along, I let down my guard.
It's then that I, and everyone else, can see what's really in my heart. A nagging selfishness that want's its way in all things. In the little things I show my desperate need for Jesus to save me from this selfishness that is always ready to rear it's ugly head. How I handle the little things offers ongoing teaching and example for my children--either for the good or the bad. The little things show who I really am.
On seeing my reflection, I took myself in hand and asked Jesus yet again to take away the selfishness in me that expects the universe to orient itself in such a way that I can always find what I want when I want it. I asked Him to fill the part of my heart that can't deal with lost socks. I asked Him to be my Savior yet again.
It's the little things that keep bringing me to the foot of the cross and recognizing my need for Him in every part of my life. Thank God for the little things.
This month’s topic: What do you think?
1 comments:
Anonymous
said...
January 27, 2012 at 6:26 PM
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Wow, Tess! I've had more "black sock" moments than I'd care to count. I often beat myself up about them, but am learning, albeit slowly, to view them as a reminder to be at the foot of the cross. Thanks again for your encouragement to keep our eyes on Jesus, always.
~Lisa