"Life is messy. Clean it up." This Swifter ad may have done more to save my parenting than most books I've read.
I don't know about you, but in early parenting I so often missed the best moments because I dreaded the mess. Forts in the living room, pillow fights, toys strewn throughout the house as children's toy soldiers attacked dinosaurs while storm troopers come to the rescue. I failed to see the creativity or fun focused instead on the piles and time to make right.
I'd grump about spilled milk at dinner. Fret about ice cream running down shirts. Think twice before getting out the finger paint.
Then, came the commercial. "Life is messy. Clean it up." Sure they were selling brooms and mops, but they extolled an important truth. Life--well lived--is messy. The answer isn't, "Avoid the mess." The answer is, "Clean it up." 
Instead of worrying about messes, I invested in the tools, and the mindset, to expect a mess and simply focus on the fact that we can clean it up. When I have the tools on-hand and the expectation of mess in mind, I don't worry about the mess. I know it will get clean. Instead, I revel in being with my children. I crawl into the fort. Fling the pillow. Make my own version of purple with the paints. When we're finished, we clean it up.
The spiritual, emotional, and intellectual arenas of parenting can be messy, too. Children ask tough questions. Fall apart on the inside with messy emotions. Struggle with doubts about God's goodness or presence. The same truth rules. Life is messy.
Too often I have longed to avoid the mess in these areas. But, God still says, "The answer isn't to avoid the mess. The answer is to clean it up." I just need the right tools. A vigilant prayer life, thinking shaped by scripture, wise friends who can counsel. I need time with my children, ears to listen, and a heart filled with grace. With these tools, God can use me to clean the messes.
Too many parents, myself once in this camp, miss the best of life trying to keep it neat. The best of life is messy. Let's engage--knowing we can clean it up.

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