"I don't want to grow up!" My daughter sobbed on my shoulder. Not sure where this meltdown was coming from, I took her into my arms for a cuddle.
"I want to stay seven. I don't want to leave first grade. I don't want to do multiplication. I don't want to grow up!"
Boy, if I could give her that wish--I'd grant it in a New York minute. Truth be told, I don't want her to grow up either. I don't want her to give up her childish wonder, her desire to cuddle, her love of teddy bears who are absolutely real to her. I'm amazed that, at seven, she even has an appreciation that moving on sometimes means giving up. How do I respond?
We can't stop time. We can only teach our children that time matters--so grab it.
"Honey, if you want to hang on to seven--then you need to take every day and give thanks for it. When you play with your teddy bears--really enjoy your teddy bears. When a friend comes to play, don't waste the time squabbling over turns or hurt feelings--instead, enjoy every moment with your friend. As you do your school, enjoy today's assignments. If you fully engage in each moment--then, you will be able to hold on to seven."
Not exactly the answer she wanted. She wanted all-powerful mom to wave a wand and promise she could keep the life she loves. I can't do that. I can only encourage her to love the life she has.
To give thanks in each moment. To pay attention. To not waste now with complaining or selfishness or worry. Perhaps in this, every moment becomes one she wants to hold on to. A life at every stage that she doesn't want to leave. What better gift can a parent give a child?

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