Do you want an innovative way to connect with your children while teaching life lessons? Plant a garden. Sure, you’ll get either beautiful floral center pieces for your table or fresh veggies for the fridge. More importantly, gardens provide the opportunity to explore the nature of relationships in a way few other endeavors can match. Gardens teach:
· Good takes time. Machines deliver instant results, so it’s for children to believe that all good things come at the flick of a switch. Machines may deliver instant results; people take time. So do gardens.
You plant a seed; nothing happens—for days. When the sprout finally emerges, weeks pass before it becomes a recognizable plant. The first bud or bite can take more than a month. While we’re waiting to bite into that first juicy tomato, we can help our children understand that people likewise take time. That gross boy from math class is on his way to witty and caring; that stuck up girl will become a compassionate nurse. We just need to wait for them to blossom.
· Good needs tending. Watering, weeding, fertilizing, pruning are key to healthy gardens and relationships. Our children get the excitement of welcoming a baby sister or meeting a new friend. Grasping how much work must go into keeping this relationship going is more elusive. They are going to have water their relationships with time and fertilize with care and concern. They will have to weed out bad habits and prune away distractions. As they learn to tend gardens, they learn to tend relationships.
· Some relationships die. No matter how carefully a gardener tries, some plants die. So do some relationships. It’s heartbreaking. It seems like such a waste to have spent time and effort on something that never bore fruit, yet it happens with gardens and people. No matter how much we care and work, it dies. Learning to replant the cucumbers and try again is great practice for choosing to pursue relationships even after a beloved friend has cut off contact or faded away.
· The harvest is worth it. As you enjoy the color of your flowers or a juicy strawberry dessert, children learn the work is worth the effort. Just as with gardens, there are moments where we can doubt that the time with brothers or best friends is worth it. But, then you have that glorious afternoon playing together or that long talk that reminds you how special this person is to you. In the moments of harvest we enjoy the fruit of our labor and gain momentum to keep going. Whether you plant enough beds to feed your family or a single tomato plant in a pot on the deck, tending a garden can teach your children life lessons they can’t learn anywhere else. So, grab your gloves and a hoe and get digging.
This month’s topic: What are your favorite garden memories with your children?
